Tag: Thoughts

My Dog the Manifesting Machine

animal blur canine close up
Photo by Kat Jayne on Pexels.com

The movie is set. The popcorn is popped. The kids are pj-ed. Bruno, my dog, is prepped in his usual spot, back to the tv, sitting before the couch, staring adamantly at me.

He’s poised. Focused. He’s certain of his coming treat. And as I sit there munching on the popcorn that Bruno is so eagerly awaiting bits of, it occurs to me…this dog is a manifesting machine.

I’ve been listening to life gurus and reading the self-help books for years. Manifest. Source energy. The secret. Your vibrations. I get it; I hear what they’re saying and on a very superficial level, I get it. But to live it? I’m still on that journey. And yet, here before me, day in and day out, is this manifesting master; my dog.

He knows exactly what he wants; Popcorn bits tossed up which he can nab out of the air and swallow whole. He’s certain of it’s coming; so certain in fact, that every move I make, he flinches, prepared to leap. He’s doing everything in his doggy-trick-arsenal to get his goal. He sits- and that’s all he can do, so he sits and sits and sits. When one path (Mommy throwing popcorn) seems to be becoming stale, he tries others! He sits and stares at Daddy, then kid 1, then kid 2, and then he starts all over again. And perhaps most animalistic, least human-like, and so very vital and powerful- he has no concept of worthiness. He doesn’t spend hours and days and years toiling over being worthy of treats. He has no concern of being “not enough”. He just shows up, knowing exactly what he wants, and does what he can do with certainty!

Can you imagine if we chased our own desires this way?

Can you… can I… Focus on our goal(s) the way my dog focuses on flying popcorn treats? Can you see them (your goals) with assurance of their fulfillment? Can you commit to doing anything and everything in your power to achieve it? Can you follow through on that? Can you change course when prompted to do so? Can you not judge what you want?

Can you believe it? Can you live it?

Numbing VS Nourishing

Photo by Chris Liverani on Unsplash

When you’re tired, down, defeated, sad, alone, lost…do you nourish your mind, body, and spirit? Or do you numb it?

So often when we’re experiencing any of the above emotions (and many others) instead of feeding ourselves what we need, we fill up on junk that may give a moment of release, but ultimately robs you of the opportunity to truly find a sense of replenishment and energy. I’m not just talking about diet here- we are what we eat. But we are also what we watch, read, think, how we sleep, what we believe in, who we spend time with…we are a culmination of many habits, preferences, and circumstances.

To make matters of numbing vs nourishing all the more confusing, we’re bombarded with messages on social media, tv, movies, music, everywhere really, with false information about what will make us feel better.

But the reality is that chugging Fanta in the street will never be as exciting as it appears in the ad. Binge-watching Seinfeld for the millionth time (it’s a classic, I agree), because you just need to zone out for a bit, will not give your mind the peace it craves. Eating the entire cake will not make the stressful situation in your life any less stressful or any more dealt with. And that impromptu shopping spree? It’ll only disguise the inferiority and fears you feel for a hot second. But we all know this, right?

TV is not inherently evil. Fanta and sodas probably are not either. Shopping can be pretty fun. And I, for one, really love chocolate cake. But when we use decadence, laziness, sugar, caffeine, booze, among tons of other stimulants and numbing-agents, to keep us from feeling what we’re going through, we’re losing out. Instead, is it possible to set these indulgences in our lives aside as just that? To enjoy them in a way that honors our growth? Is it possible to look into the behaviors that we’ve called “resting” and call them out for what they really are? Hiding. Procrastinating. Numbing. 

How do you respond to your body’s call for rest? For nourishment? What are some ways we can replenish ourselves without the boozing, the bingeing, and the self-loathing?

 

#truth

Jeannie Yogini

Jeannie Yogini PDF- CLICK HERE

(Note: Jeannie Yogini contains some profanity. fyi.)

I recently participated in a Yoga Teacher Training (RYT200). It was amazing and I felt the need to memorialize the experience and give a little something to the other amazing yogis I’m learning with. So I wrote Jeannie Yogini; Jeannie is in her first teacher training and learns that yoga is about so much more than poses. Enjoy!

What are you reading?

My reading material for the flight home today. Looking forward to learning how to better love and support the men in my life…

What’s Next?

A member of my family passed recently. He was warm, kind, very much loved and will be missed. Currently I am in my hometown for the services.

At funerals there are always such assurances as to the whereabouts of the deceased. I find myself wondering where they hoped they’d be- I don’t mean in a heaven vs hell way. And I’m not necessarily talking about their religion. More a curiosity as to what they hoped would be next for them. Will it be what they hoped for? What you hope for and what you actually believe are often not the same thing.

When I think about these things, the idea of my body returning to the earth, my mind and soul simply being released and gone- I’m ok with this. I guess you could even say that I believe that; that we return to where we’re from. The earth. It’s cyclic, like so much of the natural world is, and that makes sense to me. But what do I hope for?

I like the idea of reincarnation. Still cyclic and my brain likes that. More than that, I love this thought of all the things we could become, the things we may become part of. So while I can’t yet in my journey bring myself to believe in it, I hope for reincarnation; to be (even part of) something lovely and uplifting.

I think my Uncle T would most definitely come back as something generous, loving, and bright, as he was all of those things.

What do you think is next?

What do you hope is next?

Conflicting and loving it ❤️

My four-year-old loves Darth Vader (see the tiny tattoo on her hand), jewelry, wrestling, dresses, sword fighting, nerf guns, pretending, being a self-dressing mismatched mess… she’s everything. And when people ask if she’s a girly girl or not, I don’t know how best to answer and usually respond “both.” She loves the princesses. But she also loves the heroes and witches and villains- in her play, she tries them all on for size. She’s a consistent reminder to me that you don’t need to fit into anyone else’s parameters, societie’s ideals of femininity or masculinity. She’s a constant lesson in not categorizing people, including myself. Can you imagine if we could simply let our children (and really anyone else) be as they are with no expectations and no judgement? In short, she is living as her truest self and challenging me to do the same. Conflicted and loving it. What are you learning from the “little” people in your lives? (I think there’s maybe a cool poem idea in this?)

Vampire Spa

Vampire Spa! Click Here!

Click the pdf link above for Vampire Spa, the last of my spooky poems for October (I know, I’m a day late with this one!)

Join Chrissi Rae Mathis for a trip to the spa where she’ll learn that beauty is not everything! Enjoy 🙂

“Seasons of Love”

This morning we got up, did the usual morning bustle. I gathered my kids’ bags and lunches and nap pads and water bottles. Purse. Phone. Book. Kids to the car. Feed the animals. And we’re off!

As I pulled out of the drive, a tiny red leaf drifted down and landed on my beat-up Toyota. I’m not sure why, but I felt like I had to get out and snatch it off my hood. It was just too tiny and perfect and red. So I popped out, grabbed it, and gave it to my girls.

I love when September comes. For me, the arrival of September means that Summer is over, even if it doesn’t feel like it. The hottest days are behind me. Soon the sweating will end! It means Starbucks’ pumpkin scones and reverting back to hot, rather than iced, coffee.

For whatever reason, the coming of Autumn is always a pensive time for me. Every year I feel like I find myself stuck in my head for a few weeks. This past week I keep finding myself thumbing through my notebook that I use as a planner and I’m scrolling back over old journal entries. I discovered that last year this week I binge-watched a bunch of grisly horror films on a free, kid-less night. Ha, yes, Fall also means spooky everything. Gotta love that.

Anyhow. We measure our lives using all sorts of handy, if arbitrary, calendars, measurements, cycles. The 12-month calendar. Birthdays. Christmas’. New Years. The School Year (especially for students, parents of students, folks in education jobs). And also the seasons.

This makes me wonder if maybe we just feel like we’re our best selves, or at least closer to being that, in specific places, at specific times. Like people who prefer AM to PM. Summer to Winter. Are inspired by the sea but not so into the forest. And of course, there’s the company of people we love that can help bring out our best. I suppose when we feel most in our element, all those juices, creative or whatever they may be, flow a bit freer and some ritual, whether we’re aware of it or not, emerges whenever we find ourselves in these “happy circumstances.” Evenings coming on us earlier, layers of clothes, hot beverages, cold weather, pumpkins and scary everything…I’m in my element when the Summer ends.

This is what I thought about while driving my kids this morning. These thoughts brought me to scrolling through my phone seeking the wise words of Jonathan Larson, creator of Rent. I cranked up “Seasons of Love.”

Anyone who stumbles on this post, I wish you to find your “happy circumstances;” the people, places, and times that light you up. Tell me, how do you measure your life? Goals? Growth?

Alright, enough. Measure your (life) day in love. 🙂 Have a good one.

 

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